Browsing 9Gag, I happened to run across a meme that seriously ticked me off. Â The person who posted it revealed he was 19 years old, and the text was: “One girl my age, with no kids, and not a slut, please.”
I can see the first two parts as being sort of reasonable – I mean, I wouldn’t want to date a 70 year old, nor would I want to date a 20 year old. Â People would most likely want to be within a certain age range near theirs. Â That makes sense.
The second part isn’t too bad – I’ve heard a number of women grouse about the fact that once they have kids, it’s much harder to find someone to date. Â Personally, I think kids are a joy – I wouldn’t have a problem dating a woman who’s got kids. Â But, I can also understand why some male wouldn’t, for quite a few reasons.
But the third part… *SIGH* Â See, on 9Gag you submit meme or images, and people vote them up or down. Â Those that get voted up high enough end up on the front page of 9Gag, which means enough people agreed with it to get it on there. Â 16,310 votes.
My problem is the slut part. Â Now, I’m not going to say anything new, I’m sure, but damn it, I’m going to say it anyways.
First off, “slut” is an extremely subjective term. Â It ranges everywhere from “she’s slept with hundreds of guys” to “she’s sleeping with someone besides me.” Â It’s a stupid term, really.
Second, what’s the poster looking for? Â A virgin? Â Someone who doesn’t have sex at all? Â Because, you know that second one? Â A year from now, same guy is going to be posting how he just wished she’s have sex with him. Â If he said “Someone who doesn’t cheat”, I’d be OK with that one, too.
Apparently, there’s some sort of narrow band where a woman exists where they aren’t either frigid, or a slut. Â I have no idea what that band is, because I’ve never cared.
I’ve had a pretty sorted past when it comes to who I’ve slept with. Â When looking for a relationship, I have no care about their history (well, except for the issue of STD’s) – I’ve had relationships with gals who’ve had many less partners than me, and many more partners than me. Â Why does it matter?
And, to throw more into the “why does it matter” question, just because someone had quite a few partners earlier in life doesn’t mean they are still going to do that after meeting the right partner. Â I mentioned I’ve had a good number of sexual partners in my past – that’s not how I live my life now. Â So, even if someone considers the term “slut” to be a meaningful term, it doesn’t mean they continue to be so.
Now, I’m not going to say I’ve never agreed with someone when they’ve referred to a girl as a slut before – it’s been ages since I have. Â And, I’ll admit it – I never even thought it was really a bad thing back then; it told me who I needed to go introduce myself to. Â (That sounds like a horrible joke, but… well… it’s only partially a joke.)
The real thing, like so many other criteria we judge people on, is “does it matter”? Â Nope, of course it doesn’t – if two consenting people want to have sex, and no one else is being hurt in the process (IE, cheating on their significant other, that sort of thing), could we as a society finally butt the fuck out of it? Â (Unfortunately, the answer is probably not: we always need something bad to say about everyone else.)
Sorry for the long rant on “slut” speak. Â Have a Deadpool and a smile.